Finding a Role
Easter is a time of rebirth and renewal – and we see it all around as nature comes to life encouraged no doubt by the dramatic drop in pollution. This year I have been planting loads of vegetable seeds. It really is extraordinary to watch the tiny green shoots appear as the first sign of them becoming what they are meant to become. Give plants (and humans) the right environment and they flourish. And Boris has risen – hopefully to be renewed though whether it will have as profound an effect as a rebirth we shall see. Serious illness is a great leveller, a very humanising process, and often does cause a re-evaluation of priorities and values.
This is set against the news of economic collapse and the (expected) rising numbers of daily deaths. While the longterm consequences will need to be faced, I am pleased to see that Italy’s numbers are steadily falling and I expect ours will be soon – around the 17th so only a few days to go in the current phase. The South West region has fewer deaths both in absolute terms and per head of population than any other English region – indeed about half the next lowest (East of England). In that sense we are very fortunate.
Perhaps the final word about ‘staying safe’ – I have summarised the key points at https://www.bremzero.com/staying-safe-summary/ You will remember the story of my melting an incoming credit card for Sandy. The new one duly arrived and Sandy managed to cut up the wrong card! So hopefully third time lucky!!
Meanwhile over 700000 people have signed up to help with the crisis and retired doctors are being invited to return to the NHS - which already has about 1.7 million staff (the fifth largest organisation in the world after the US and China military, Walmarts and can you believe it McDonalds). Those of us stuck at home with our usual roles gone want to feel useful. Online communication and the occasional trip to the supermarket can leave you dissatisfied. So we put ourselves forward for new roles. I received the warning of a potential medical call up. What would I do? In the at-risk group, did I want to volunteer for the front line or do remote GP consultations with patients I did not know? Would it be cowardly to say no and heroic to say yes? Having not seen a patient for six years would it be safe? Would it be useful? The system is moving forward thanks to the efforts of many great younger doctors, nurses and others who hardly need another older liability to look after. So after much deliberation when the questionnaire arrived I offered to do non-clinical and support work. It said I would be contacted within three days. Two weeks later, silence. Not even a ‘thank you but….’……. Inevitably given the scale of both the numbers applying and the level of change out there, any response is likely to be delayed. The same is true for others who have either volunteered or who are having to redefine their usual supportive role within the community. The process can leave one frustrated, and feed into a sense of dislocation and disconnection.
There are three main processes in the body that underpin our emotional responses – the ‘Red’ survival action mode, the ‘Blue’ self-esteem achieving mode and the ‘Green’ self-compassion being mode.
At the beginning of the epidemic we were all busy with survival and the Red – and may have noticed how our behaviour had changed – for instance more alert, less sleep. Not surprising as it is driven by adrenaline designed for fight/flight responses. From time to time this process reappears when for instance we become alarmed with news. The issue of finding our new roles relates to the Blue system and our self-esteem. This is driven by the hormone dopamine which you need to avoid depression and many people are feeling quite flat and losing motivation. Those of us who in general are driven and nourished by achievement will notice this most – and are probably looking for new skills or challenges to keep themselves motivated. Meanwhile the Green system relates to ‘being’ and self-compassion rather than any specific action. Its associated chemicals are oxytocin (raised when you fall in love) and morphine (which removes pain and gives you an instant high). While Red asks the question ‘How will I survive?’ and Blue asks ‘How am I different from others?’ Green asks ‘How am I the same as others?’ and so as it comes more into play, we see the community sharing, generosity of spirit and in our better moments more being at peace with ourselves.
So I limit my diet of Red fuelling news, accept the Blue struggle with redefining my role, and find myself content to be busy with the daily chores, with the garden, with bike rides, with on line communication, and have gratitude for being here and being healthy. Green renewal in its way if not exactly as fundamental as a rebirth.
So in the spirit of the Green, wherever you are on this journey, keep safe and be kind to yourselves.
With love
Derek
I welcome feedback and do send details of any resources you have found particularly useful.
You can find a copy of this and all previous blogs plus some resources at the following new website:
https://www.bremzero.com/coronavirus
There is a summary of how to stay safe at https://www.bremzero.com/staying-safe-summary
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